Three Weddings and a Funeral

Aria’s Vegas Wedding Reception

In some ways, it felt like it was more mine than hers (I made the playlist, both slideshows, 'oked' the final decorations, helped mom write the agenda, typed it up for the MC/DJ, and provided all of her accessories).

Actually when I say it like that, it sounds like I'm turning into the main character from my favorite rom-coms.

In which case I end up with James Marsden. And I am very much ok with that. 

Aria asked me what shoes she could borrow, and I graciously opened my hoard. But the thing is... Spencer is only slightly taller than Aria, so she was reduced to wearing my silver sandals (coincidentally, the same ones I wore to her wedding in Hawaii). 

Aria couldn't wear heels... so Eliza and I decided to both wear 4-5 inched ones. ;)

We sang "For Good." It was a little unpracticed, but still good. Ya. Still good. 

We danced. We talked. We partied and smiled. We didn't do a lot of clean up because many of the decorations would be recycled for Ari's wedding two days later. Instead I ended up talking with the Crists, a couple that was married the same day as our parents.

They watch Doctor Who. We geeked out.

She wants me to write her son on a mission in Portugal.

Arranged marriage number 5.

Ari’s wedding

I was the flower girl bridesmaid, protecting the bridal bouquet with my life. It was a LONG day. 

I know it was technically my second time being a bridesmaid, but it felt like the first. People asked me to DO things and be responsible for important wedding stuff. *Note to future people: Do NOT ask a bridesmaid to do stuff. Bridesmaids are busy taking pictures and looking pretty and anticipating what the bride needs before she articulates it. I say this in all seriousness. Ask me to keep track of vases? I'll forget them on the temple grounds (yes. That happened). Ask me to roll out the carpet for the isle? And how exactly am I supposed to do that when I'm walking down it 5 seconds later? Think about it.*

Holding the bride's bouquet? That I can do.

I really liked taking pictures as bridesmaids and with the groomsmen. We didn't really do that at Aria's because we were all just family. There were a couple of great ones that I hope to get eventually. *Note to future self: Brides are busy people and pictures aren't really the foremost thing on their minds. Have patience. You'll see them eventually.*

Grandma's Funeral

I saw cousins I haven't seen in years. It's amazing how much some people have changed... and how much some people have stayed the same. 

My mom often says that funerals bring people together in ways that no other event will. Not everyone will come to a wedding or mission farewell, but EVERYONE will come to a funeral.

I loved seeing everyone, and spent some quality time laughing and playing with some of my cousins. Others... I don't remember speaking to. Funny how that works out. The viewing was full of music and memories and family. It was good... even though it dragged on. 

The actual funeral was very much the same: full of music and good, even though it dragged on.

But I didn't cry.

Not even when we sang Aloha Oe and wheeled her casket down the isle. 

No, the only time I teared up was when I mentioned being hungry and someone accused me of being insensitive. So in essence, I cried because I wasn't crying, and realizing this made me cry even more. 

I was a mess that day for all the wrong reasons. Urgh.

We took a family photo, the most complete one ever, probably. My great uncle even photo-shopped out some of the headstones. Thoughtful of him.

We took age-group pictures. Eliza insisted that I join in on this one, even though it's her age group and not mine. Everyone in my age group is on missions. I never thought I'd miss Michael so much.

TJ and Roma's Wedding

We had car problems on previous trips to Utah, so this time we rented a van.
Sorry, I should have checked to make sure that you guys were sitting down before sayings something so shocking, but it can be safely assumed that you were, since you are probably reading this at a computer.

Thomas Blackham married Roma Marie. Different people know both of them by different nick-names, so no one knew what to call them or what names to address the card to. I guess I'm kind of glad that my name is fairly nick-name proof. ( Sorry Aria, 'Layn' is never going to catch on.)

But it was time well spent with people I love (and that includes our little jaunt to Fantasy Con with Marissa), and nothing is more important than that. 

We decorated the car, which Eliza and I instigated and was carried on with enthusiasm by about half the wedding party. There's no WAY they didn't notice when we all left suspiciously for that hour...
It was my third wedding in a week, but the ONLY one that had a decorated car. I'm glad we did it.

What did I learn from this fantastic flurry of events?

I learned that it is not impossible to request 10 days off of work, so make time for the things that matter. (It helps if your supervisor is recently married and part of your reason for leaving is a wedding.)

I learned that it all boils down to people. Bridesmaids are there to support their friend, the bride. The guests are there to honor a friendship between some member of the wedding party. The wedding party throws a gala to celebrate this special moment with all of their friends. 

In the end it doesn't matter if the car looks stupid or the wind blew down all the fake floral decorations. It doesn't matter if you cried for the right reasons, or that the Relief Society had 15 different types of funeral potatoes at the luncheon. 

At the end of the day, the person beside you is the only one who matters.
It's the person you'll be embarking on a new life with.

The person who held you up as buried a loved one.

It's the person who has been beside you time and time again.

These are the people who matter.
That's what three weddings and a funeral have taught me.