This is not how I imagined Senior year to be. I only have ONE class with all of my good friends in it. Only one of my friends has lunch with me, the rest have shortened schedules.
The classes are harder, but more enjoyable.
This is also the time when, even if you've known someone for many years.... you realize that you don't really know them at all.
The first time I heard that my friend wanted to be an Elementary School teacher and attend UNR was because a teacher asked her, and I happened to be in the room. Why didn't I know that?
I'm not completely sure what I want to be.... but that doesn't mean that I don't care about the aspirations of others, especially my friends.
The other thing is Homecoming.
My friends are so different than I am.
I clearly remember, at about this time last year, we had the "Stake Priest and Laurel Lake Trip."
None of my friends were able to make it, so I hung out with some of the guys (which is new) in Stake. One of the guys spent a better part of the 5 hour boat trip talking to me about his Homecoming woes. He was telling me how he wanted to ask one of my friends to Homecoming, but found out that she had already been asked...three times. He kept talking, but I was somewhere else. "Why was he talking to ME about this? This girl is my friend, but ... doesn't he realize how much this hurts? He is talking about his woes of wanting to go with a girl who has been asked multiple times to me. I, who have never and will never be asked to a school dance."
It was something that didn't seem like a huge deal, but something that I haven't forgotten.
Now, a full year later, the topic of Homecoming comes up again. Melissa went Sophomore year, Dawn went twice Junior year ( I still don't know how that worked out), and this year Emily was asked.
But it doesn't happen like all of those stupid Hollywood/High School movies depict it as. The guy who asked Emily is... a real jerk. But she is too much of a sweetheart to say no. Any and all of the rest of us would have answered with an emphatic, "Don't even bother." when this guy said, "What would you say if I were to ask you to Homecoming?'
Yes. Emily is going to Homecoming with a guy, which is something I have never/ will never do. But this guy isn't even really nice to her. Her whole consolation in the affair, is that "At least Dawn will be there." because, Dawn is always asked.
Dawn has always and will always be asked to every school dance that she is old enough to attend. It always kind-of perplexed me. But I was recently alerted to the mind-warping constant and annoying "interactions" she has to deal with. She is constantly badgered about "hanging out" with guys. They have re-scheduled parties so that she could attend. Then something comes up, and she can't go (again), and she never hears the end of it. She is stretched thin between commitments to friends, family, and guys. The texts she receives from guys make a whiny monolog, stupid drama, and call-me-when-you-can-schedule-a-hang-out.
Yes. Dawn gets asked to all of the dances... but she has to deal with this all of the rest of the year.
Melissa has been asked to dances before as well, but not as many. But she doesn't take crap from anyone.
Especially guys. That's what's cool about her.
And then there is me. I was asked to "The Formal." But that was arranged by a dear friend of mine (Ari) who is dear friends with the guy's Mom. I've said a lot in this post that I have not/ will never be asked to a school dance. This, I regard as the Gospel truth.
But it doesn't make me sad. There are good guys out there... they just happen to be dating other girls who may or may not deserve them. I'm not close with guys. Heck, I only have one brother.
Looking at what other people who do get asked have to deal with... I don't envy anyone.
And that is kind-of an important realization for me.
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